Shannon has a new friend

I’ve been trying to think of a blog idea for a couple of days now. And suddenly, I’ve had this enormous tidal wave of idea come falling upon me, squeezing out any room for other thoughts. So, I though to myself,
“Self, why don’t you just start typing and see what happens? It might not make sense, it might be embarrassing or it might cause loads of people to hate you and turn your name into some obscure swear word. But at least you’ll mind will be clearer!”
My ‘self’ is really more intelligent than me. I should give her more credit.
Yes. Yes you should.
Oh fantastic. Even in my blog, I’m talking to myself. Righty-o on with the show!
Wow. That was truly original. Do you write your own jokes?
Oh, bugger off, Self. I shouldn’t have to put up with you ruining my blog!
Sorry, little miss Big Shot Author. Please forgive my humble and too-stupid-to-come-up-with-any-ideas self
Apology accepted. Now shut up.
Anyway, before I was so rudely interrupted by myself… Nope. Lost it. Well thats just fantastic.
Oh yeah!!
In English, we’re doing A level work because, at our school, top set start A levels a year early.
And, as part of our really, very interesting course
(no) we have to write a soliloquy.
Bet you couldn’t spell that without spell checker
Yes, yes alright! My point being…
The soliloquy is supposed to be by Malvolio, from Twelth Night. It should be 500 to 1000 words long; after the creative writing part, we have to analyse our work, brining the total number of words to no more than 1500.
I’ve done about 250 words so far. And I actually quite enjoy it! I like Malvolio as a character, not because I feel sympathy for him, but because I can mock him in my writing. And I know it makes me sound like a horrible person who should not be fit to become a doctor.
Thats not why I don’t think you should become a doctor.
…
I don’t think you’re clever enough.
Well, you’re a voice in my head. Who’s the more clever one now?
Anywho, according to my English teacher, I’m apparently a naturally sarcastic and cynical girl (not so great for interviews… I’ve imagined saying something sarcastic in answer of a question and, not just not get the job, but also get banned from the shop…) and that it comes across as quite funny!
Hahaha you’re making me laugh with this rubbish!
…moreover, with Malvolio, he’s someone who views himself as the innocent, even when he’s the main ass muffin in the story. So I can have lots of fun with this, playing around with the “I’m innocent and I’m the victim even though I’m an utter dick to everyone else in the play”
Yeah, I like A level Literature!
Goodnight gang!
Personally I hope you have nightmares.
Are you talking to me or the reader? Actually, I don’t want to know.
Shannon.